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Halo
Posted on Tuesday, September 30 @ 16:04:55 EDT by Suislide
FPS reviewsYeah sure its a pretty good FPS but its overhyped as hell. People say its the best game ever, hell fucking no, there is way better games than Halo. Half-life as a small example.

Graphics: They dont look to bad. I mean the models look old and shitty and all the textures are fucking bland as my hairy white asshole. The bumpmapping although did make certain things look pretty damn good. The only problem is the game fucking runs slower than my grandma who has two broken legs becauses she old. I have a amd2700/Radeon 9800pro and at 1024x768 with no AA or AF with max detail it ran slow as all hell. Even though this game isnt that graphically intenese its still slow. Monkey said he ran it fine but who cares hes a shit head

One thing that did help it run better was starting the game with the command -use20. This forces it to use ps2.0. Gearbox obviously has either been shooting large ammounts of heroin, or there is 1 fucking nerdy ass guy working for the company. They default the FX cards to run at ps2.0 BY DEFAULT and Radeon cards at ps1.4. WHAT ARE THEY FUCKING STUPID. JESUS CHRIST EVERYONE KNOWS THE FX's ARE SHIT AND PIXEL SHADER 2.0. Shitbox (Gearbox) must have hired people with single digit IQs.

Sound: Weapons sound pretty decent, Music is pretty good. Also the speech is ok. Except the things your teammates say sometimes are the most retarded phrases ever. I could have made some better pharses then they did by shitting on the microphone and smashing it into my forehead.

Gameplay: You the play the role of, get this, MASTER-IN-CHIEF. OH WOW! Master-in-chief! How fucking cool! Whoever thought of that name should have been punched in the neck. Anyways the gameplay is pretty standard. You run around and basically shoot stuff. The gameplay is about equal to Serious Sam except with vehicles. The game is fucking reptitive. I walked through the same halls in some levels (343 Gulity Spark) for like a fucking hour and they all look the fucking same. Like some shit head was too lazy to think of a new area to create so he just copied and pasted the same area 500 BAJILLION FUCING TIMES. It makes it seems like you are going in circles. How fucking stupid why the hell would any jackass do that?

The weapons are all right, except for the sniper rifle. I have never seen a more useless weapon in my fucking entire life. Why would anyone use this piece of shit. Sure it has a cool blur effect when you zoom in but guess what i dont fucking care! Theres also some alien bullshit weapons and the good ol shotgun.

Story: Theres some ring planet bullshit called, OMG GUESS IT, Halo. If you didn't get the answer you're a fucking retard. Yes and halo is actually some weapon. So you go there to shut it down. But these alien bitches try to stop you and stuff. Then you release some flood bullshit, then stop it. The end. Yeah thats right i fucking spoiled it, suck my greasy nuts bitch.

Yeah the game was fun but it got annoying as my fucking great grandmother who can't shut the hell up. She fucking talks and it makes me want to hit her with a loaf of stale bread. It was annoying because of the reptitive levels. 7/10

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Half-Life 2

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Average Score: 2.54
Votes: 51


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Re: Halo (Score: 1)
by Shn on Wednesday, October 01 @ 11:52:24 EDT
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this game plays like poop on my comp.
Sure i have a geforce fx, but still, there's a fucking P4 at about 3Ghz with 1Gb of DDR3200 !!!!!!!!!!

argh.


[ Reply to This ]

  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Friday, October 22 @ 23:40:14 EDT
  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Saturday, May 14 @ 08:11:23 EDT
  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Saturday, May 14 @ 08:12:16 EDT
  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Saturday, May 14 @ 08:12:28 EDT
  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Saturday, May 14 @ 08:14:33 EDT

Re: Halo (Score: 1)
by Grooveygr (Party@Your.Moms) on Wednesday, October 01 @ 16:58:03 EDT
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Geforce 2 mx200.
need i say more?...

well the game runs (as one, 16 color, pixel that covers the entire screen) and from what i've seen its not as amazing or inovative as people are/were claiming.
sure, driving the buggy with the mouse is pretty fun; but you can feel its just a lame console convertion of what otherwise would of been really great.


[ Reply to This ]

  • Re: Halo by Suislide on Wednesday, October 01 @ 17:22:30 EDT
    • Re: Halo by Grooveygr on Wednesday, October 01 @ 17:32:24 EDT
      • Re: Halo by M0nKeY on Wednesday, October 01 @ 19:56:42 EDT
        • Re: Halo by Shn on Thursday, October 02 @ 08:34:38 EDT
          • Re: Halo by Grooveygr on Thursday, October 02 @ 12:06:07 EDT
            • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Thursday, July 22 @ 19:21:43 EDT

Halo Soundtrack (Score: 1)
by M0nKeY on Wednesday, October 01 @ 19:55:01 EDT
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BUY YOUR HALO SounDTRACK TODAY!!! [www.amazon.com] (not)
...actually it got pretty good reviews. ANyone know a way I can rip the music right out of the game?


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo RULZ (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Friday, January 02 @ 18:22:05 EST
Ohk, the fact of the matter is that your playing Halo on computer, now you computer SUX, THe reason the bloody thing goes slow is becuase you have a shit graphics card and shit MHZ. Also the reason you think everything looks the same in 343 Guilty Spark is becuase you are so shitful that you dunno your way around. How can you judge a game when you can't even play the fuckn thing! So once you learn how to play and how to update you shit ass computer, you should then post a reply!

DVD


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Thursday, April 29 @ 02:07:27 EDT
Dude, HALO rules. At least on Xbox. When playing on multiplayer with multiple xbox's hooked up it is awesome. Yes, the campaign levels are repetitive, but the multiplayer is where it shines.

Also, you are a "Master Chief" which one of the ranks in the Navy.


[ Reply to This ]

  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Thursday, July 22 @ 19:12:48 EDT
    • Re: Halo by Suislide on Tuesday, September 07 @ 20:41:50 EDT

Re: Halo (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Saturday, October 23 @ 00:57:51 EDT
r u serious..... it's master chief buddy. Don't go dissing something without at least having the right info.


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Saturday, October 23 @ 03:52:37 EDT
Man, I am a halo guy, ALL THE WAY, i've got this

GeForce FX 5200, 128mb DDR, and get this, it's PCI,

I have a Celeron 2.4ghtz processor,

512mb ddr 266mghtz...... lol

And what's EVEN BETTER is........

That I pwn u all! If u don't like it, GO ELSEWHERE, if u do like it, post ur comments here. Because hey, it's a WONDERFUL GAME FOR MYSELF, and I enjoy the game, and find out ALLLLLL the possibilities in multiplayer, single player, etc. It's not that I have the time to spare, it's that I have the time to devote to it every now and then, because I have this nack for curiosity that goes beyond u mother fuckers. And enjoy halo! It kicks ya' asses to hell!


[ Reply to This ]

  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Saturday, October 23 @ 08:56:48 EDT
  • Re: Halo by Anonymous on Saturday, October 23 @ 10:00:49 EDT

Re: this guys a dipshit (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Friday, February 04 @ 17:45:14 EST
Ok, so you think the game is crap? Tell that to the multi-million people that think your an idiot at this point. That's right now you just look stupid, if i were you id just go crawl in a corner and die...


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo (Score: 1)
by jetbot33 on Thursday, October 04 @ 00:54:14 EDT
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WTF? this game goes with no lag at all on a crappy Dell laptop from 2001 with maximum res and maximum video settings. seriously is ur computer the one that bill gates first made? and o ya the game dominates over all the other fps


[ Reply to This ]

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