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Halo 2 [XBOX]
Posted on Friday, December 24 @ 12:36:51 EST by Suislide
[XBOX] Action Game Reviewsfuhrer writes "This game is a fucking piece of shit. Those bungie shitheads are fuckin retarded fagg0ts and look like mentally retarded jews. i havent even played halo2, but just from the gayness of its vibe, i can tell its a piece of crap. the fact that it made $130 million on release is fuckin retarded and shows america is the fucking regoddamtardedest place ever.

Graphics: Refer to halo. Bungy added a few new textures and made mister chief look more homosexual but that's about it. By adding new specular crap, they decreased performance so prepare for lag and crappy san andreas background loading. Half Life 2 makes this game look like an nes game.

Sound: no idea, but im guessing that it's some shitty same old themes techno-ized or something gay like that. they probably still have some nigger like oj simpson playing mister chief and jenna jameson playing k0rtanna.

7h3 st0ry: is a piece of shit. this game was fucking supposed to take place on earth. bungy decided that they needed more money for fuel rod shaped dildos so they stretched the story and made halo2 halo1.5 because they knew all the stupid cock sucker xbox fags would buy this shit anyway. basically, the story goes like this: mister chief straps on his green gimp suit with vasoline inside. then he gets his rifle and semen-nades, kills some cubbanents by stabbing them with his spartan dick. btw, you find out that mister chief is a nigger. you can tell because he gives that jew kortanna a 45 MB rape and kills her. then he gets off by pulling the race card.

Gameplay: bungy couldn't have fucked themselves harder up the ass with xbox controllers this round. they didn't redefine, but refucked the gameplay completely. they weakened the pistol and made the clip size 4 or something gay like that. NOW YOU CAN DUAL WIELD, WOOOOOH, OH JESUS FUCK ME IT'S A REVOLUTION IN GAMING. now you can shoot like a gangsta nigga on da streets and cap those wop cubbanents. theres this ri11y 7i7e scope on the rifle too, like itz a scope nigga. since most people who play halo xbox are retarded white trash, bungy made it so that you just shoot bursts, you dont even have to control them. they added this gay ass knife thing for noobs to use online. they also added 2 new gay projectile weapons so that more noobs will play online and fuel rod your anus to death. bungy didn't feel that halo2 was gay enough so they made it so that you can do an anal attack by sticking the fuel rod up peoples asses. for anybody that thinks joining a server is too complicated for their redneck mind, bungy has taken the liberty to make it so you can't pick a server. they say that joining random servers is exciting like 69ing a life size mister chief doll in bungy studios. there's also a "nigger fuck" melee cheat using gameshark where you can fold out a mechanical dick and pound cubbanents in their assholes with a violent thrusting motion. honestly, only a fuckin cunt with fagulitis could enjoy playing this spooge that bungy coughed up.


Cuntclusion:I cant believe i wasted time watching a fuckin video for this shit, i could have been playing a real game like half life 2 or looking at my personal gallery of gabe newell. This game doesn't even deserve to suck half life 2's dick or even link's 3 incher. since so many fuckin retarded poor albino kykes got their sweathog fuckass proletarian mothers to buy this crap, bungy's building themselves a gaylo fortress out of hundred dollar bills and cum. i wish i could titfuck that bungy princess whore or shoot her in the head and brainfuck her. those fucking idiots at bungy better not fuck over the PC port this time or ill personally jam a cumnade into their eyes and scalp them.i hope this gay ass stupid country gets bombed to death by czar bombs from dune coons and slants in north korea.


this game deserves a 3/10 and not that fuckin 9.8 that those ign qeers gave it or that 9.4 that those shitfucks at fagspot gave it."
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Halo 2 [XBOX]

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Re: Halo 2 (Score: 1)
by Suislide on Friday, December 24 @ 14:04:13 EST
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i find the picture really adds flavor to the review


[ Reply to This ]

  • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Saturday, December 25 @ 07:05:30 EST
  • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Friday, July 01 @ 19:06:56 EDT

Re: Halo 2 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Friday, December 24 @ 15:01:42 EST
The fuhrer has understood - and so will you all:

Allah o'akbar, brothers! Meet your new masters, the apostles of the holy prophet Muhammad!

Witness the dawn of a new era, the rise of a new order - and to all christians, jews, hindus, atheists, disbelievers, heathens and the rest, this I say: you will all yield to the iron fist of Islamic Law, as decreed in the Holy Kuran, the GREATEST of all books.

Allah o'akbar, Allah is great. Kneel before us!


[ Reply to This ]

  • Re: Halo 2 by Suislide on Friday, December 24 @ 15:31:03 EST
    • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Sunday, December 26 @ 23:50:12 EST
      • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Sunday, December 26 @ 23:53:36 EST
      • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Thursday, December 30 @ 23:51:50 EST
  • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Wednesday, January 05 @ 18:25:34 EST
    • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Wednesday, January 05 @ 22:59:22 EST
  • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Thursday, January 06 @ 13:34:18 EST
    • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Thursday, March 03 @ 00:35:38 EST
  • Re: Halo 2 by Anonymous on Thursday, March 03 @ 00:33:50 EST

Re: Halo 2 (Score: 1)
by Richard on Friday, December 24 @ 19:13:08 EST
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i didn't read it but i'm pretty sure it sucked retarded donkey anus. just kidding.


[ Reply to This ]

  • Re: Halo 2 by fuhrer on Friday, December 24 @ 20:04:00 EST
    • Re: Halo 2 by Richard on Saturday, December 25 @ 01:39:41 EST
      • Re: Halo 2 by fuhrer on Saturday, December 25 @ 02:11:44 EST
        • Re: Halo 2 by Richard on Saturday, December 25 @ 13:54:37 EST
          • Re: Halo 2 by fuhrer on Saturday, December 25 @ 18:09:21 EST

Re: Halo 2 (Score: 1)
by leadmasterofmasterchiefs (lifesuxthenudie@mail.com) on Friday, December 24 @ 20:37:23 EST
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couldnt be fckd reading the review, but ill give it five stars for the picture


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 1)
by Drk_cHilli on Monday, December 27 @ 14:53:30 EST
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it is shit. fact.

a decent review at last. thanx.


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, December 28 @ 07:19:25 EST
Great review. halo2 sux ass


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Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Thursday, December 30 @ 06:57:13 EST
Hinduism RulezzZZZz
all you fags will get pwnd one day...


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Thursday, December 30 @ 13:04:11 EST
You all suck ass! This is the greatest game, and this is the gayest site with the most homosexual asswipes ive ever seen. You havent played Halo2? then go fuck yourself before you say something asslicker. and the fact that this racist motherfucker-full site exists plagues my existence you ass lickering son of a bitches.


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Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Monday, January 03 @ 13:06:08 EST
How could cortana be a jew? she is a hologram with a tron outfit covering her breasts. Master chief could very well be black.

I had to disgard 90% of this review because the word nigger, gay, fuck and many other foul slang was used to describe the game. I never knew playing Halo 2 would make me a homosexual.

Eh this is stupid nothing will be solved by this post.



[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 18 @ 19:11:37 EST
That...was the most childish review...I have ever seen...did a ten-year old write this?


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 1)
by delta_john on Tuesday, January 25 @ 00:06:23 EST
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NOW! I definetly hav something to say about the review made by Fuhrer....It is the most pathetic piece of garbage covered in Michael Jackson's cum that I have ever had the regret of reading. I mean, comon, listen to this fag

"This game is a fucking piece of shit. Those bungie shitheads are fuckin retarded fagg0ts and look like mentally retarded jews. i havent even played halo2"

What an idiot, This guy must really love Half Life 2, after all, it is a game chalk full of glitches, at times, I wont say it's graphics are crap, cuz there pretty good, but it does have a stupid multiplayer.
Im havn fun comparing Halo 2 to HL2, mabet ill go on...There are people that debate which games' graphics is better, Ultamitly, regardless of video card, It IS Halo 2's graphics that are better. as proof, it is a fact that HL2 has glitches and flaus in its graphics, not to diss it, but "IF" you have played the game then you would no that sometimes there are slight pauses and twinks that are results of design errors.
Now if you "HAVE" played the game, unlike most of the racist n00bs on this site, take a look at halo 2s graphics. What I am about to say isn't my opinion, its a fact, if you "HAVE" played the game then you would know, Halo 2s graphics are virtually flauless. Thats right you n00bs! Learn whats good and not for wonce. Im sick of these guys that play one game, worship it, and say anyother game is gay, or stuff like that. I happen to OWN a copy of Half Life 2 and Halo 2, and am a dedicated gamer. This post is starting to turn into an article, mabey ill post it as one latter, but for now...

As for sound, ehh, both games have their good and bads. HL2s radio's sound isn't that great. Halo 2s veacles could have had more detailed sound.

The story line for Halo2 is pretty good. The only thing bad that I can say about it is that it could have had something better than switching between master chief and the covenant elite.
Now I really have to say shit about HL2. This game's developers spent soo much time developing it, and making it better, right? As soon as I played it, I was amazed by the opening cinema. But then...No Crobar? wtf? no weapon to start with at all? This pissed me off, but I told myself that it could be a level where you dont fight at all, untill a guy hit me. MAN WAS I EVER PISSED WHEN I COULDNT FIGHT BACK! Aside from that, what was Valve thinking when they made half of the game a dam remake? I mean, I DID beat the game, but I thought there could be much more chapters than what there was. Im not complaining about the ending, it was fairly ok.

The gameplay wasnt that bad in HL2, however I think Valve could have added more mutants. I may have beat the game on hard, but it could have been harder. Want to know another thing that pisses me off about half the people(n00bs) on this site? Its that they probably played the game on "easy" dificulty and then said "YEAY!" to their friends and told them they beat it on "hard". The multiplayer for this game doesnt have enough options, which isnt very good.
Halo 2 was pretty good when it comes to new things. It included battle damage, dual wielding, and no jump damage. As soon as I played it, I was amazed. I have absolutly nothing bad to say about Halo 2 in Campaign, But, Its multiplayer, omg!

The new matchmaking system that they have for Hslo 2 is horrible at certain times, but only these times...Capture the flag on a level like Zanzibar, Beaver Creek, and other levels that contain "many" walls and floors. The flag can easily be passed through walls and floors. One time ive seen the most increadable thing. On Beaver Creek, three people managed to get the flag from its spot to 20 feet into th air; above the Base by using two plazma granades, needless to say, that was increadably gay. Some could say that was cool. I say it takes some skill to take advantage of increadably cheap ways to get the flag, and win. The other thing that sucks is that you walk slowly when you ha

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Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 25 @ 00:13:05 EST
Halo 2 does suck major dick

Half-life 2 just pwnz the it in all its holes.


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 25 @ 00:41:34 EST
Fuck you Roman, thats right...I know its you, you Dumass Russian!


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 25 @ 00:43:48 EST
seriously, WHO would draw master chief's dick besides someone who would want to suck it, like fuhrer, he probably drew this, then jerked off to it.


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Friday, January 28 @ 15:54:37 EST
"9.4 that those shitfucks at fagspot gave it"

Well HL2 got a 9.2 from "fagspot". So if a 9.4 is bad then a 9.2 for Half Life 2 must mean that game blows...Also IGN gave Halo 2 a 9.8 and HL2 a 9.6. Wow all these professionals seem to disagree with you...Also if you go to gamerankings.com you'll find that overall RE4 is ranked higher than Half Life 2...Hmm but how can that be if HL2 is the best game ever? It's because it's not you fucktard fanboy.


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Saturday, February 26 @ 12:20:37 EST
Wow, usually people PLAY the game before giving a review -_-;;


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 1)
by GothicLord13 on Saturday, March 26 @ 22:29:16 EST
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You guys are fags only a fag would think videogames suck


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Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Friday, April 15 @ 22:23:12 EDT
Looks like someone needs a Review 101.

First thing's first -- when reviewing a game, try and piss off as few minorities as possible. You KNOW some day someone will report this site to the US government and get it shut down for violating several felonies.

Secondly -- when reviewing a game's storyline, make references to the storyline... making racial, orientation, and religion jokes only prove that you know nothing.

Thirdly -- Congratulations on the Graphics part -- the only thing you actually mentioned technical is that Bungie added "specular crap" to Halo 2... that was also in Halo 1. What /was/ new was normalmaps (or bumpmaps, practically the same thing... only real difference is the process used to create the bumpmaps... be it hand or computer generated off of a high polygon model) on non-static geometry (before it used to be a BSP-exclusive only... though there was rumours of one Halo CE modder getting bumpmaps on Mastercheif... right before his computer crashed.)

Now you should properly know how to create a review... assuming you flip your spellcheck to English from Smacktard. I am not a Halo 2 worshipper, it definitely had a lot of room to improve and didn't live to its hype. Though, I didn't write a review to say Halo 2 sucked just because the general public liked it... people like that (I like to call them shit-disturbers, or attention deprived teenagers) are the types of people who buy trenchcoats, dye their hair green, and pronounce themselves as Wikken solely so they can carry around a big ass knife and play the Religion card when anyone tries to take it from them.

Please take this advice seriously -- and maybe you'll gain more credibility than a smacktard's weblog.


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, April 19 @ 19:23:39 EDT
I say the review was the best and funniest one i have ever read EVER. This review is also one of the most how should i say... "revealing" onces i've read. for n e of u who care 2 c another 1, here's the link:

http://students.uat.edu/aleandre/Halo2.html

luckily you can't post comments on it, so those of you who don't like it can take it up the butt ^_^


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Tuesday, June 28 @ 18:29:40 EDT
MMK. First of all, what are you, a damn KKK/Nazi? Yeah Halo2 kinda sucked, but you can't review a game you haven't played. Learn how to fucking spell. Oh and also, I don't know about YOUR dick, but mine ain't got black stripes on it. Why would you hope America get bombed because of a game? YOU'RE HERE TOO. Besides, what's with all this ass rapage? Get fucking laid.


[ Reply to This ]


Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 1)
by youguysneedagirlfriend on Sunday, March 12 @ 13:56:30 EST
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WTF????? That pic is gay

ALL YOU FUCKING COCKFAGS REALLY NEED TO OPEN YOUR EYES AND GET OFF OF THE GAMECUBE AND ACTUALLY LOOK AT HALO 2 IT HAD THE BEST GRAPHICS AROUND WHEN IT CAME OUT AND THE ONLY THING THAT HAS BESTED IT IS SPLINTER CELL: CHAOS THEORY AND A FEW XBOX 360 GAMES. And to all of you mother fucking racists insulting the muslims and jews and blacks, go to fucking hell you think that they have an inferior religion, NO! god damn mimi-hitlers. The game play is awesome and the soundtrack is one of the best I've ever heard. Not only that but you really gotta open your biast eyes shit prick and actually play it before you review it. IGN is one of the best gaming sites on the net and the reviews they give are true. and the reason microsoft and bungie got 130 million dollars from it is because it's a good game not retarded get a life, get off of the couch and stop masturbating to porno. Really man are you fucking gay or something cuz you really make it sound like it. GET A GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING LIFE AND LEARN TO FUCKING SPELL, THEN PEOPLE MIGHT RESPECT YOU. THIS REVIEW SUCKS AND SO DOES THIS SITE


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Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 1)
by Kalafan on Monday, April 24 @ 17:52:02 EDT
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"MY ELECTRONIC COCK IS BIGGER THAN YOURS. THE CD I SQUEEZE IT THROUGH IS BETTER THAN YOURS."

Once again proof that religion, politics, and gaming really DO have a lot in common, in that every faction populating the three aformentioned subjects has a good portion of obsessive zealots who can't stand to hear dissent against what's "HOLY AND RIGHT." And if they do have to hear dissent against whatever visual reporduction of coded files they've baptized themselves in front of, they'll start screaming crazily like a jihadi, only with the literacy of a 3 year-old.

Guys, Halo 2 (multiplayer) was pretty sweet when it was released, but the flavor didn't last forever. The single player campaign, as far as I can tell, consisted of HUGE environments that contained a comparatively tiny amount of (bland) navigable space. The "big" multiplayer maps appear to be significantly scaled down in size compared to those of the originals, and the weapons are fucked up. The BR epitomizes everything that the term "NOOB TUBE" embodies, and the Shotgun, a reasonably-ranged ass-kicker in the first game, is now only effective if you are less than ten feet away from your opponent. Adding the boost function to the ghosts and banshees was fucking retarded and constitutes one of many inconsistencies between Halo 2 and the original.

Despite all these flaws, I'm not joining the fledging "Boycott Bungie" campaign, sending in retarded petittions to them, or begging the Pope to excommunicate Jason Jones. If I didn't like the game I'd have simply returned it and moved on, like any reasonable person who doesn't consume whole bowls of sugar while watching DragonBallZ all day long.


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Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 1)
by Thinias on Saturday, August 05 @ 03:15:15 EDT
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Dumb. Ass. And I wish that was all I had to say. No, let's have a look at this shit and break it down one piece at a time-

Graphics: Refer to halo. Bungy added a few new textures and made mister chief look more homosexual but that's about it. By adding new specular crap, they decreased performance so prepare for lag and crappy san andreas background loading. Half Life 2 makes this game look like an nes game.


- Bungie added a few new textures???
a) If you want to present a convincing argument, you should at least demonstrate the intellectual capacity of correct spelling. Bungy. What a dumbass.
b) They revamped the ENTIRE visual system. Have you ever even seen either game? The visual specs of Halo 2 are so much remarkably crisper, shinier, and prettier than those of Halo 1 that they have even been the butt of jokes from Rooster Teeth, inc. - creators of the popular web-series Red vs Blue.
- Prepare for lag and crappy san andreas background loading
... You're even going to TRY to comment on the loading times and gameplay latency of a game you opened by ADMITTING you'd NEVER PLAYED!??! What the fuck is wrong with you? Was your mommy trying that new coathanger abortion fad and only managed to get rid of your brain? If you'd ever played the game you'd know that the only lag you EVER experience on the video side of things (assuming an xbox in proper repair) comes from closing menus mid-game, and even then it just takes a second or two for the textures to come back; once they do the game runs perfectly. If played on the xbox 360, this issue doesn't even exist.
- Half Life 2 makes this game look like an nes game?
Half Life 2 and Halo 2 are built on the same generation graphics engine, by two competitive enterprises with engineering departments hired from elite sects from across the globe. Both companies hire outstanding artists, in both 2d and 3d creative capacities, and subsequently they both produce outstanding artistic results to display with their equally impressive graphics engines. The only difference in graphics comes from the different feel you get in the alternate HUDs and the different appearance of the enemies (and friendlies) presented in each universe. But you know, I guess you would know better than me, given your undeniable intelligence (qeers? rediculously overused leet?) and marked experience with... oh wait, thats right. You never played Halo 2.

Sound: no idea, but im guessing that it's some shitty same old themes techno-ized or something gay like that. they probably still have some nigger like oj simpson playing mister chief and jenna jameson playing k0rtanna.

- Wow. You're actually dumb enough to begin an argument by stating that you have no idea what you're talking about? Let me check that one more time.
Sound: no idea

Nice. I don't even have to refute that one, you've already completely discredited any opinions you may (or perhaps more appropriately - may not) have offered, though i'm sure the porn references do wonders to increase your popularity with the ladies. In fact, I bet you were getting laid while you were writing this. ...Oh... really? She couldn't find your penis? Most unfortunate - there are surgeries and organics you can try to help with that one, pencil dick.


7h3 st0ry: is a piece of shit. this game was fucking supposed to take place on earth. bungy decided that they needed more money for fuel rod shaped dildos so they stretched the story and made halo2 halo1.5 because they knew all the stupid cock sucker xbox fags would buy this shit anyway. basically, the story goes like this: mister chief straps on his green gimp suit with vasoline inside. then he gets his rifle and semen-nades, kills some cubbanents by stabbing them with his spartan dick. btw, you find out that mister chief is a nigger. you can tell because he gives that jew kortanna a 45 MB rape an

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Re: Halo 2 [XBOX] (Score: 1)
by SirNuX on Friday, August 25 @ 05:05:43 EDT
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Finally someone to agree with...
Im Totally behind fuhrer, At least he understands what games are good and wich don't


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