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Borderlands 2
Posted on Saturday, October 27 @ 17:39:42 EDT by Suislide
Action Game Reviewshuleyn writes "Yeah, if you pre-order shit without thinking, this is what you get. So you see, this is the sequel to a game called Borderlands (if you don't know it you're a retarded console player living in HELL.), which was a FUCKING AWESOME combination of FPS and RPG, and it wasn't an epic fail like SOME OTHER DOG SHIT *cough* Fallout 3-NV *cough*. Anyways, Borderlands was some fucking gold game where guns were random drops, each gun was different from another, and there were 87 bazillion guns. I don't know how many zeroes are there in a bazillion, but it sounds big. Like my balls.

mes.

Graphics, well. Shit. They sure did improve most stuff. But still ITS NOT, GOOD, except some parts. This is a cartoonish game (NO, ITS NOT AN ANIME), but still you can easily say the graphics rival some of the new games. Ever seen the ice on this game? Its got some 3D REFLECTING SHIT, it isn't some old 2d texture shit they put up in other fuckfest ga
They worked on the graphics though you can see that, but still... it can't beat Crysis.

Sounds: If you ever played Borderlands 1, you know this: Gearbox didn't spend shit on voice acting, everything is TEXT. But in this game, they spent a little bit more money on voice acting. BUT FUCK THIS FUCKING SHIT PILE OF DOG SHIT. WHAT HAPPENED TO MORDECAI BITCH?!?!?! Mordecai used to be the badass sniper of the first game, he was a coldblooded assassin with no mercy, and now he sounds like a 20 years old mexican rapper. WHAT THE FUCK GEARBOX??! And what about the bandits!?! They sound like friggin CLOWNS with GUNS and SHIT-FOR BRAINS. It has more voice acting now, but instead some parts of it SUCK. MY. BALLS. And Axton. His voice doesn't fit the bill, and Gaige screams like a cunt when she gets hit by an elemental weapon.

Gameplay: Its the same concept, you kill people grind for shit unique guns with red texts and OH GOD MINECRAFT EASTEREGG. Anyway, since this is HALF RPG, there are not 20+ skills for each character. Instead, there is one action skill you get in level 5, and the rest are passive shit. Each gun is random, and sometimes you get uniques, which are awesome. I got something called Blockhead, which is a shotgun that shoots minecraft fire textures and when you reload it you toss it and it explodes, and a new blockhead "digistructs" into your hands. Headshots are crits, and there are elemental weapons which kick ass with balls of steel. Anyways, don't select Zer0. SO MANY ZEROES IN MULTIPLAYER OMFG


8/10 Buy this buy this buy this but not for consoles.

"
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Average Score: 1.95
Votes: 23


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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Sunday, October 28 @ 00:07:52 EDT
This was the most worthless review I've ever seen on this website.

I used to respect your swear laced reviews. Atleast they were honest.

But this, well, wtf is this??? Borderlands 1 was a pile of dog SHIT! I returned that game the day right after I bought it because it was such a piece of garbage. The guns were just some random combinations of 3 parts, that were either red, yellow, blue, or green depending on what type of damage they did (fire, shock, corrossive, or explosive).

And Fallout New Vegas was a pretty awesome game, who the fuck would even talk shit about that game? (Unless you bought the glitchy ass PS3 version, but that's you're own fault.) I had more fun playing that game on the PC then the gayness that was Borderlands 1.

And I'm pretty sure Borderlands 2 is just as gay as the first game.

8 out of 10, get the fuck out of here with that bullshit.


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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Sunday, October 28 @ 00:20:57 EDT
Oh and Borderlands 1 didn't even have a story, it was just some generic bullshit for multiplayer. That's why all of the NPCs only gave you text messages.

It was like 'Left 4 Dead', you either play as the cardboard cut out, over-stereotyped: crazy war vet, some dumb vagina, or the nigger.

Ya, some brilliant character development there. Steven Jewbag Spielberg should hire the writers for his next emotion jerking bullshit movie.

Borderlands is not an RPG, it's an overpriced online co-op game. There isn't anything wrong with online co-op games, but lets not pretend it's the second coming of black Jesus (Obama), ok?


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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 1)
by cBox on Sunday, October 28 @ 04:22:34 EDT
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Looks like suislide was drunk again when he let this shit slide.

What you call "cartoon graphics" is nothing more than a bunch of post processing effects like cellshading and stroking shapes to give them black outlines. That's it. It's not good graphics, it's a cheap shitty copout. The game looks like ass, so did the first one. And the voice acting is atrocious, you basically get the same shit as with Serious Sam and his talking bimbo brain implant.


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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 1)
by huleyn on Sunday, October 28 @ 04:26:59 EDT
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Hey, I don't give a fuck about what you guys are saying. PLAY THE GAME BEFORE YOU COMMENT ON MY REVIEW, ASSHOLES.


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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 1)
by ZippyDSMlee on Sunday, October 28 @ 13:28:30 EDT
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Its not THAT bad/good. LOL


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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 1)
by TheKrustaceox on Friday, November 02 @ 17:58:48 EDT
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Guy says too much "Shit", sounds like a fucking Suislide gay wanabe (if thats even possible)


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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, December 11 @ 09:00:06 EST
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Re: Borderlands 2 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, December 11 @ 09:00:11 EST
Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu uuuuuu ccccccckkkkkkssssssssss!


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