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The Punisher
Posted on Sunday, January 30 @ 16:00:36 EST by Suislide
Action Game ReviewsYes, the movie sucked complete ass and now we have a game to make us want to kill ourselves playing this turd fucking game. Its a PS2 port also which means bad gameplay and shit graphics!

Graphics: The graphics in this game are decent at most. Frank Castle (The DickSucker/Punisher) looks like a gimpy retard with a mashed face. His fucking chin is gigantic and his face sags worse than an old mans testicles. Everything else is boring as hell looking. Enviornment, other characters, etc all just plain average looking. The graphics in this game are jsut plain fucking boring, and of course there isnt a single use of pixel shaders because hell that might have helped. Then again with these cunt developers they probably would have just made Punishers penis look shiny. The graphics in this game are just plain dark and boring looking.


Sound: The sound is so fucking terrible and boring that i don't even know what the hell to say about it. The gunshots are completly boring. You might as well turn off your fucking speakers because the sound is just shit. The voice acting is about as the movie which concidentally is like a goat shitting on my face. The music is just flaming ass.


Gameplay: Heres where the game really shines as the light reflects off it because its covered in water because you are fucking flushing it down your toilet. The gameplay is completley repetitive as all you do is fucking shoot the same boring ass looking guys over and over every fucking level. They try to incorperate new things such as the TORTURE THIS GUY AND MAKE HIM TALK! But its so fucking lame and boring and you do it every fucking level and its completley useless except for getitng health. THen again you wont need the damn health because this game is fucking easier than a fucking college girl who just took 5 GHB pills. The levels blow ass too, you just go into abunch of broken down areas and they all look like shit. Ooo Now you are in a forest also! Wow! You can upgrade shit like body armor and such but it doesnt fucking matter because this game is so easy. Infact there is this one thing you can upgrade that gives you health when you kill guys. So after you get that you might as well uninstall this hunk of shit and shove it up your pussy. This game fucking sucks complete shit.


Story: Sucks! You decide to just go around and kill some people causing some shit but then you get involved in other shit out of left field like STOP THE NUKES FROM COMING IN. Yeah you know the US govt wouldnt stop nukes from being shipped in but the punisher sure can. A fucking drunk guy who should kill himself because his family sucks and so does he.

This game sucks fat shit 4.5/10

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Average Score: 3.31
Votes: 22


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Re: The Punisher (Score: 1)
by null on Sunday, January 30 @ 16:06:12 EST
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you forgot the lame "guest" heroes coming in and out of the "story"


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Re: The Punisher (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Monday, January 31 @ 02:16:04 EST
are there any good games coming out before march. it seems like theres this 3 months of solid shit.


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Re: The Punisher (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, February 02 @ 09:45:51 EST
hehe, so thats how much movie-games suck


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Re: The Punisher (Score: 1)
by Drk_cHilli on Thursday, February 10 @ 16:54:08 EST
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'Gameplay: Heres where the game really shines as the light reflects off it because its covered in water because you are fucking flushing it down your toilet.'

ahaha


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Re: The Punisher (Score: 1)
by Daniel_Vanzant on Friday, February 11 @ 04:53:46 EST
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I got so fucking bored of interrogating motherfuckers i just started blowing thier cunt ass faces off. The only real fun is picking up a butcher knife and bashing that fucker into some fuckholes face and hearing his last mumbled words. I didnt get to see the movie nor do I give a yeast infections chance of caring about it. In the comic books he's got a bad ass motherfuckin chopper why couldnt it have been included I want to do a burn out on somebodys face but those fucks didnt put any thing cool like that into the game.


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Re: The Punisher (Score: 1)
by Grumpy_Boy on Sunday, February 13 @ 23:44:31 EST
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at the end of the day games based on films are nearly always shit, so anyone that buys one is a fuckwit (no offense meant)


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It's so pathetic it's sad... and I'm not talking about the game (Score: 1)
by HateThisFuckingPage on Thursday, November 17 @ 09:42:41 EST
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Ooohhhh, you’re all so big, ganging up in this gay-club and masturbating over how many times you can cram the word ’fuck’ into some random piece-of-shit article in some feeble attempt to cover up the fact that you are all a bunch of unintelligent shit-talking 13-year old losers who will never see a female genital in real life and therefore has to gain some sorry kind of self-esteem in the most pathetic way possible. I can’t even be pissed at you, because I feel sorry for your lack of life.
By all means, whine, cry and bitch like the little girls you are, but know that you are all losers, and you will never stop being losers.

Losers.


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