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ShellShock Nam' 67
Posted on Wednesday, September 15 @ 14:12:18 EDT by Suislide
Action Game ReviewsCumshot Nam 67 is more like it. This is another one of those games thats a massive hunk of twat. Its just so fucking terrible it should have never been released, now more people are comitting suicide because of this shit game.

Graphics: The graphics are great. So great that my 6800ultra literally shut off in the damn game because it wasnt doing any work. This game looks like fucking dog turds. Lets put it this way... you take abunch of shitty low polygon models right? Ok next step is to open up mspaint and make a terrible fucking 128x128 texture, and you have to have never used a computer before. THEN you get a level designer that is a fucking moron. You combine all these elements and you have the shitacular graphics of Cumshot Nam 67. Sure its released multi-platform because they just want to make money off stupid people who buy this game (*cough*). THe point is though it looks so fucking bad that i cry at night. The graphics in this game made my fucking dog blow up. This game makes quake 2 look like it was fucking released yesterday. Oh yeah my favorite was the OCTAGON BARRELS, THATS HIGH POLY RIGHT .


Sound:IT SUCKS DICK. The sound sucks big huge dick that everytime you play this game cum is flying out of your speakers all over your mouth. The sound is just all completley ass that there is nothing to even say about it.


Gameplay: Oh my god. The gameplay is so fucking stupid, its nothing like vietnam at all. So its third person and you get the standard controls. You character moves like he fucking took a shit in his pants the size of a boulder. Also the huge as cross hair and hud help you aim because they are so big and clunky. You walk around and kill 100 gooks that all look exactly the same. Also for some reason i seem to have god mode in this game. I stand out in the middle of a field getitng shot to hell. OH WOW I DONT DIE OR TAKE ANY DAMAGE. I seem to have magical fucking powers of letting bullets pass through me. I would go to pick up a med pack and BLAM, i couldn't. The dumb cunt programmars seem to have left out a damage system. The only thing in this game that does seem to kill me is the artillery weapons. Oh yeah you also do exciting original things in this game like, PLANT THE C4 WOO. I FUCKING LOVE PLANTING C4 IN EVERY GAME I PLAY. After i found out i have to plant c4 again i promptly formatted my hard drive. This is definatley not too extreme considering the amount of dick this game sucks. I didn't even want to have graced the presence of my awesome hard drive.


Story: Story? What Story? HAHAHAHAHHAHHHAHAHAH fucking faggots

This game makes god cry 1/10

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Average Score: 4.45
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Re: ShellShock Nam' 67 (Score: 1)
by Grumpy_Boy on Wednesday, September 15 @ 17:02:10 EDT
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Good stuff first laugh i've had all day.

Shit I can't belive its this bad I'm almost tempted to try just for a laugh, or maybe I will get angry and start smashing thing again.
Any way war games are shit and fuck Nam it was a shit war anyway its about fuckng time the yanks stoped crying and moaning about it and got over it most of the people that were in it are dead now anway so who gives a rats cunt.


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Re: ShellShock Nam' 67 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, September 15 @ 17:26:27 EDT
you know if you had a vocabulary this review might almost be worth reading,, what a retard,


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Re: ShellShock Nam' 67 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, September 15 @ 17:31:32 EDT
I like babies, and I like santa claus.


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Re: ShellShock Nam' 67 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Thursday, September 16 @ 23:22:03 EDT
"So great that my 6800ultra literally shut off in the damn game because it wasnt doing any work."

Fuckin hilarious!


- Ghostbear


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Re: ShellShock Nam' 67 (Score: 1)
by Disco (go@fu.cky.our.se.lf.n.et) on Sunday, September 19 @ 22:33:23 EDT
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Damn man I was about to buy this game. Fuckin A well, I guess I'll just get CoD Expansion.


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Re: ShellShock Nam' 67 (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Saturday, November 13 @ 16:10:47 EST
"Sound:IT SUCKS DICK. The sound sucks big huge dick that everytime you play this game cum is flying out of your speakers all over your mouth"

OMG, I pissed myself reading that.

And yeah, I even own the game too :'(


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Re: ShellShock Nam' 67 (Score: 1)
by Drk_cHilli on Thursday, December 02 @ 16:50:40 EST
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your reviews pwn keep up the good work!


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