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Re: Half-Life 2 (Score: 1)
by Starkweather on Thursday, March 08 @ 16:56:41 EST

Dear god, how could you give that shit an 11? Pull Newell's viagra-charged cock out of your ass for two seconds here, Suislide.
I'll give the game its dues, the graphics are (or were) pretty sleek, and the gameplay wasn't terrible, but holy batfuck, the story. The fucking story. How ANYONE could enjoy HL2's "story" is beyond me. Imagine Uwe Boll eating a line of Mexican immigrant's asses out and then puking up the contents of said asses on a piece of paper. That's about the equivalent of quality that were talking about here.

The character development sucks balls as well. You're asked to help a bunch of faggots to whom you have all the emotional attachment to of a dead hooker. And even more insulting, you don't get a piece of Alyx's sweet mudblood ass when you finally beat the game. Those cunts.

And the ending just left that shit hanging there, simply because they wanted to fuck more money out of us by creating shitty "expansions" that add shit that should have already been there in the first fucking place, to which you have to pay fucking $20, HALF the price of a retail game, to play.

GMAN : "Here, go do a bunch of seemingly non-related shit for no fucking reason!"

GMAN : "Hey thanks! You just killed thousands of people, risked your life countless times, resisted the temptation to bang Alyx in her sweet virgin ass, but, unfortunately, I'm not at liberty to tell you the MOTHERFUCKING REASON WHY YOU DID ALL THIS SHIT. SO FUCK YOU, I'M OUTTA HERE."

Well fuck my ass. I'm glad that good ol' warez scene is alive and kicking, because Valve is officially on my list of companies of whom I will never pay another fucking cent too.


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