Flatout: Ultimate Carnage
Date: Saturday, September 06 @ 00:50:20 EDT
Topic: Racing Game Reviews

There is no fucking ultimate carnage here. It should just be name FLATOUT, THIS IS THE SAME FUCKING GAME AS THE LAST 2. Seriously, if you put this games together and blurred out the copyright date, had two people play this game, they couldn't even fucking tell which one came out first. Ah well, well here it is! The latest installment of Flatout!

Graphics: Well the graphics in this game are pretty decent enough. All the tracks have plenty of detail of them with tons of destructable items in them. You will smash pretty much into EVERYTHING from other cars, buildings, railings, gas tanks and tires. There is usually a ton of this shit found throughout all the maps. The environments also vary from the city type, farmlands, other various shit ones. Theres a slight problem in that they aren't fucking varied enough. Honestly, you go through the same fucking maps like 30 fucking times and even the alot of the farm looking ones feel EXACTLY the same. This is also another major problem as they look exactly the fucking same as the last game! Theres the same city, canals, and farmland maps as the last fucking game! Fuck my fucking pisshole and give me aids, WHY?! What is so fucking hard that they cant create better environments. Its a fucking fantasy racing game. Anyways, as for the rest of the game, the maps do look pretty nice. The cars have some good damage models and go from looking pristine to being beat enough to look like that piece of shit shouldn't even be running. Another fucking problem with the repetitiveness is the trick maps. They are the exact fucking same as last time as well! ITS THE EXACT SAME FUCKING TRICKS FUCK YOOOU! Create some new shit you pussies. The only thing that can be said is that the maps do have somewhat nice graphics.

Sound: HOLY FUCK. Someone ram a fucking cock in my ears and knock my fucking brain out. You thought the maps got repetitive, TALK ABOUT THE FUCKING MUSIC. I swear to god there has to be about 5 tracks from this game. All of it is abunch of fucking no-name bands that the company probably got fucking super cheap because their music sucks cock. Honestly, this is some of the worst fucking music you can ever hear. It ranges from some shity emo punk rock, to rap metal, to more emo rock bullshit. I never heard such raunchy fucking pussy music ever in my life. Im going to fuck the brain of whoever chose this music. Seriously, its so fucking bad i want to puke on my fucking dick, hope it gets rotted, and falls out. This MUSIC SUCKS. As for the rest of the sounds, they are all basically forgettable. It's the same generic smashing sounds, crashing, and other crap that you expect. Nothing really pops out about the audio except the absolute shittiness of the music.

Gameplay: Ok, so this gameplay basically consists of driving on the same ten tracks over and over until you want to fucking blow your brains out with a shotgun. I did just at the thought of having to install this game on my hard drive. Basically, a fucking turd is better than this game. You just drive around the same maps over and over, get a new and faster car and do the same shit again until you get to the last map. Then when you beat it all, you can take a cock in your ass because you get NOTHING. There is some boring ass demolition derby that you can do as well, well guess what!? Its the same shit as the last game, so are the stunt levels too. Basically this game is the same fucking shit with absolutely nothing new.

Story: The story is you are fucking faggot for ever wanting to play this game. Or for reading this review, your choice. There is no story because people who make racing games have no skill at writing.


This article comes from Video Games Suck

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