War Rock
Date: Wednesday, December 21 @ 21:13:13 EST
Topic: FPS reviews


Yet another multiplayer shooting game outta Korea, and like the last biztrillion this one is so bad that it's a crime against humanity that makes the holocaust seem like a stubbed toe in comparison.

As my reviews of Kal Online and Gunz Online have detailed, Korea has an affinity for producing god-awful piles of crap that barely even pass as "games". Unfortunately for me (If you're not retarded or pain-addicted, you will never, ever, ever, ever play this game), War Rock has no intention of bucking this trend and being, say, a playable or remotely fun game.

Gameplay:

War Rock makes it pretty clear roughly 0.2 seconds into the game that it's a blatant ripoff of the Battlefield series, minus anything which make the Battlefield series even remotely worth playing, as well as being about as well-coded as a dead horse.

For example, any weapon hits exactly where it's pointed even when you're running, jumping, or extracting yourself from the treads of one of the horribly overpowered vehicles in the game. This means you can out-snipe snipers with a colt .45; though this might take some effort as you'll have to slam the mouse button for about twenty minutes before you kill anything.

As I mentioned, the vehicles are something to be amazed by in War Rock. For example, the moment a player gets in a tank, the enemy team is immediately so horrified that half of them will immediately commit suicide and leave the game and go into a type of shellshock. The remaining players irritate the tank driver because this means they need to take the actual effort of clicking the mouse to fire the incredibly overpowered tank cannon.

Aiming, of course, is optional - so long as the tanks' gun is aimed at the same continent as the enemies, you can expect to get about 300 kills at once. The only way to destroy a tank is to convince it to run over the brightly colored anti-tank mines (yeah right), or to pick away at it with anti-tank rockets. The great thing about this is that the anti-tank rocket launcher is so weak that the tank will end up rusting to death by the time you've damaged it enough to make the guy inside it aggravated enough to actually take the effort to shoot you.

Graphics:

The games' graphics are the classic "fucking horrible" style; they look about on-mark with Quake 2 yet have a sub-30 FPS half the time. Actually, comparing Quake 2 to this is a friggin' insult to Quake 2, because at least Quake 2 was a decent game.

Sound:

War Rock has some of the worst sound in history, which is unsuprising for one of the worst games in history. The weapons are all about as loud as a ninja mosquito, which makes the feedback of firing weapons roughly as enjoyable as suicide.

Netcode:

Now it wouldn't be a Korean game without a god-awful heap of shit netcode, would it? In a Gunz Onlineish twist, War Rock has netcode so horribly bad that it's quite common for two people to die at the same time - the server can take up to a full two seconds before it updates the clients' status. This means you can have two people shoot each other about 300 times (any less won't have any effect, because the guns really are that weak) and they'll stand there looking at each other for a moment before they both suddenly die. Excellent!

Unlike Gunz online, War Rock seems to have some kind of antilag, which means these Korean failures at least tried to make a decent game before crashing and burning into mediocrity. However, this just means it's even more easy for two people to kill each other at the same time.

Score:

This game gave me testicular cancer.

-82/10





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