Perry Rhodan
Date: Wednesday, July 02 @ 16:39:59 EDT
Topic: Adventure Game Reviews


Finally a half-decent adventure game that doesn't suck complete ass. Face it, now days we have total shit for adventure games being released. Everything that comes out of the adventure company is TOTAL SHIT. Also, we have that fucking pile limbo of the lost which manages to steal content from dozens of games and movies and meanwhile still play like an absolute dog turd. BUT FINALLY! Someone has released an adventure game that actually held my interest!

Graphics : The graphics take to the old style of using pre-rendered backgrounds and placing 3d objects over top. Thank fucking god, because this helps the game to feel more like the old school games. Not to mention, the backgrounds look fucking great. None of that low-resolution bullshit. They all look extremely sharp and are filled with detail. Also, some guys have this problem where if they put 3d objects over top a 2d background, all the 3d shit sticks out like a black person at a metal concert. All the 3d models look pretty damn good and it also runs extremely fast. Crank up the AA and the details and it still runs completley fine. One problem with the graphics is the fact that its a 4:3 game. WELL FUCK THAT. All 4:3 resolutions should be destroyed, if you dont have a widescreen monitor by now...too bad...kill yourself. The game doesn't stretch the picture though so it ends up running in 4:3 with black bars on the side which isn't that big of a deal. Either way the graphics are pretty damn nice with EXCELLENT pre-rendered backgrounds with tons of detail. The alien, human, and robot are also well-done to fit the graphical style of the game. It has a very futuristic look to the game and the backgrounds and everything all look fucking dynamite to help keep this look. The atmosphere is enjoyable as you visit abunch of different locations which all a different look to them to keep them unique. Such as Terra and the Lab everything is bright and super clean, or at this mining planet everything is dark and shitty. Almost has a cyber punk look to it. So the graphics are good.


Sound: Now the sound in this game is hit and miss. The music is definitely pretty damn nice and helps to add the atmosphere. For the most part the voice acting is fine for major characters such as Perry who is voice-acted well. However, the stupid fucking disc head aliens have the worst voice acting anyone could possible imagine. Its this high-pitched voice that talks like a retarded chipmunk. Cut that shit out. High-pitched voices are so irritating it makes me want to stab my fucking intestines out and make a noose out of them and hang myself. As for the rest of the voice-acting its all pretty well done and the dialog is sufficiently interesting. The ambient noises and other sound effects all work well and fit with the games style. One thing that is irritating though is that when clicking on certain objects perry will repeat what he said about it. SHUT THE FUCK UP. I GET IT ITS SOMEONE ELSES BOX THING. STOP FUCKING SAYING IT. Other than that its nice.


Gameplay: The gameplay is a point-and-click adventure type where you basically have your inventory/speech topic thing at the bottom. You just pick up shit by clicking on it, or selecting something in your inventory to use with it. It all works well enough and definitley has the feel of an older school adventure game. The puzzles are all interesting enough. None of them were really that hard though at all which might be a problem. Or maybe its not a problem and I am just a fucking genius like we already knew. Some of the puzzles though are stupidly easy like in the beginning where you have to put the numbers above the door into the positronic thing to open the doors. FUCKING EASY. Anyways the gameplay is quite enjoyable.


Story: The story starts at some place called Terra which I guess is Earth, who fucking knows?! You play as Perry Rhodan who is apparently immortal and has been living for over 3000 years. You think he wouldn't mind killing off people then...Anyways the story plays out like you should already know about the characters and the universe. This might be a bad thing but atleast they don't have to go back and explain abunch of stupid shit that no one cares about. The atmosphere for this game is definitley enjoyable. The story starts off with Terra being attacked by some fucking jerk who wants to steal this super fucking drill to re-awaken this race that would kill everyone. Luckily, perry steps in and says cut that shit out slut. He is also looking for his lost woman who was taken by them because she is some archeologist expert. The story plays out well enough and is presented in an interesting way, revealing more and more as the game goes on. The only problem is the ending which just fucking ends without telling you anything about what happened with everyone. WHAT THE FUCK. PROVIDE A CONCLUSION.

So the game is pretty enjoyable but not the best. Not as good as Grim Fandango in the slightest! 8/10





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