Men of Valor
Date: Monday, November 01 @ 17:43:01 EST
Topic: FPS reviews


Oh my god. I should have an apology sent to me just for even considering getting this game. Although this hunk of anus is the only thing i have had to play in awhile. CONSOLE PORT WARNING!

Graphics: The models for the team mates werent bad and the apcs were ok and so was the base you start at! But then the game progresses and shows you how shitty this game looks. First off the animations for walking look like complete ass. Its like they are playing a 10FPS animation at 40FPS. They just fucking suck and seems to click every time they walk. TERRIBLE. I didn't know theres only 3 different types of vietcong! Yes apparently in this game there is about a total of 3 shitty ugly models with ugly skins on them. So if you are looking for variety in your gooks you wont find it here! The weapons are also terrible looking, with terrible skins slapped on them. Its almost like it was made for !! XBOX!!. Thats becuase it was, so that is the only explination why the graphics swallow by the gallon is because its a shitty xbox port. The only thing even remotley cool is the use of pixel shaders for explosions, but other than that the graphics are pure crappy console graphics.


Sound: *Cough* Well that should explain it all. YOU WANT 5.1 SURROUND SOUND WITH EAX 3 TO IMMERSE YOU INTO YOUR GAMEING EXPERIENCE AND BLOW YOUR FUCKING ASS AWAY. WELL FUCK YOU! The sound in this game is just plain boring, there is the occasional old 60s/70s song which is good but other than that its ass. The weapon sounds are boring and make all the guns feel like you are shooting out a turd. Also the voice acting wouldn't be half bad if the dialouge wasn't so fucking stupid. It just seems completley corny and you know the black guy has to act like a black guy and be like "YEAH WE ARE GONNA FUCK THEIR SHIT UP, I HAVE NO TEETH BECAUSE IM BLACK YO!" There is no ambient sounds of explosions and guns and shit going off like in all the other war games. There could be but if there is then they are obviously too quiet and boring for anyone to even care about. GOD WHY CANY ANYONE DO SOUND RIGHT


Gameplay: Well apparently, and i didn't know this, Vietnam was a completley straight line! I wonder how the fuck our soldiers got lost in vietnam if it was a straight line. NOPE this game is the most linear piece of shit i have ever played. Also the game is fucking easier than a dead girl. I dont know how you could lose, OH LOOK YOU HAVE TO BANDAGE TO STOP BLEEDING, waht the fuck does it matter when every single enemy has health on them? Also i noticed you never seem to get enough ammo for your issued gun. Well thats about it you walk in a straight boring line and do objectives liek BLOW UP THE CACHE OR CLEAR OUT THE ENEMIES! Wow its like ive done this before 300 other fucking games! Also the AI is so amazing that your team wont shoot enemies that are RIGHT FUCKING NEXT TO THEM. I dont know how many times i had to shoot gooks that were standing right next to my team and they didnt even shoot them.


Story: You are a stupid cunt and you are in vietnam and you have to kill abunch of stupid gooks who always seem to try and trick you and the awesome game always makes the scripted scenes of you falling for it. Oh yeah and the game cheats because of those damn sequences. I go to get behind this machine gunner to kill him after clearing out a village and blowing up. But as soon as i go behind him i die instantly. They tried to make it even more linear so you cant even use tactics because everything is part of a fucking scripted sequence. And if you are going to do those then do it fucking right you cunts. Oh yeah and checkpoint saving is fucking gay. I WANT TO SAVE MY GAME WHEN I WANT NOT SO YOU CAN MAKE YOUR SHIT LINEAR GAME LONGER BY DOING THAT. Face it when your game only has a checkpoint save systme you know its sucks a huge one because you are forcing it to be longer.

Eh its something to play 5.5/10





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